It can be frightening for a young person to realise that their gender is different to how they have been raised and seen by others, equally it can be difficult for families, but there is help out there. If your child is questioning their gender, don’t presume they are trans or non-binary. For some young people it can take time to come to a point when they understand themselves.

It may feel uncomfortable for them to be asked very personal, intimate or intrusive questions – so check if it’s okay to ask, and respect the answer.

Think about how you might feel if your own parent asked you something deeply personal about yourself.

Whether it’s ‘he’/’him’, ‘she’/’her’ or something else, address them by their preferred pronouns. If you make a mistake, correct yourself or allow yourself to be corrected, and continue to try. This will show your child that you are making an effort, showing them respect, and doing your best to adapt to their preferences.

It’s understandable if you are feeling upset, anxious or scared about what your child is going through. Being honest about this with other adults, you trust, is important and it might help to share your experiences with other families in the same situation.

Some of the organisations in the ‘Finding Help’ and ‘Getting More Help’ sections may offer the chance to meet other parents.

There are NHS gender identity services available for both adults and young people. However, there are currently long waiting lists. These services provide gender affirming treatments. It is important to note that under 16’s cannot be prescribed hormone therapy and under 18’s cannot have gender surgery.